Hi folx! If you read Ask Allison #1, you know this is a space where I post questions asked to me anonymously and answer them. Thanks to those of you who've asked me questions this week! Dear Allison, I haven't had penetrative sex yet and I want to use tampons while I'm on my period, but I'm worried they'll make me lose my virginity. What should I do? Sincerely, La Virgen Dear La Virgen, To answer your question, I want to go over what "virginity" really is first. "Virginity", as our western society typically thinks about it (depending on your religion, beliefs, upbringing, etc.) is the state of one's body before they have penetrative sex. The term "virgin" can be used both for people with vulvas and people with penises. Remember that virginity is a social construct. You may have been told, taught, or heard that when you have sex for the first time, especially if you have a vulva, your vagina will change shape, consistency, and elasticity. You've maybe heard that you'll "pop your cherry", which is referring to the hymen, a small piece of skin that covers the vaginal canal when we are born. Medically speaking, a vagina doesn't really change that much after penetration the first time, especially if all parties involved were careful, gentle, and used plenty of lubrication. Most people born with hymens (yes, there are a lot of people born without!) lose that piece of skin by the time they're ready to have sex because of various, normal activities like horseback riding, gymnastics, riding a bike, taking a hard fall, and many others. So, you'll need to ask yourself: does riding a horse make me not a virgin? The term "virgin" typically has a stereotype of "purity" or "cleanliness" around it. But sex doesn't make you dirty or impure. Sex is a normal bodily response and is perfectly healthy - it even has health benefits like decreasing stress, improving sleep, and lowering blood pressure! Consider using the term "first-timer" instead of "virgin" to take away that negative stigma. So, what are your options for period management? Well, lucky for you, there are many in the U.S. that are pretty cost-effective! Here's a short list with a few pros and cons to both. Do some research and talk to people you trust who have tried several options and try some out yourself to see which will work best for you. Good luck! Tampons -Relatively cheap, depending on brand -Very easy to access -Not very environmentally friendly -Need to be changed every 4 hours (super size) or every 8 hours (regular size) at maximum Menstrual/Diva Cup -One-time expense (usually about $35) -Can be used for up to 10 years -Needs monthly maintenance like sterilizing -Can be uncomfortable for some users -Can be left in for up to 12 hours Menstrual Disc -Small enough for youngsters -One-time expense (also about $35) -Can be used for up to 10 years -Also needs monthly maintenance -Also can be left in for up to 10 hours Pads -Come in a wide variety of sizes and shapes -Pretty absorbent, but won't stop leaks like something inserted -Need to be changed as soon as they fill up for adequate protection ~Allison

Hi folx! If you read Ask Allison #1, you know this is a space where I post questions asked to me anonymously and answer them. Thanks to those of you who've asked me questions this week! Here's one for y'all: Hi Allison, I'm struggling to understand "weird" fetishes, like foot fetishes, sex in public, BDSM, etc. Why do people enjoy "weird" things like this and how can I understand those who do? Sincerely, 2 Scoops of Vanilla, Please Hi 2 Scoops of Vanilla, Please! It sounds like you're feeling what's called "stigma" - basically, a societal or personal (sometimes these two are quite intertwined, but not always) judgement about someone's sexual beliefs, fetishes, kinks, or desires. It's really common, especially here in the U.S. because we usually are taught by our schools that sex in general can be dangerous; we aren't usually taught about the pleasure part, unfortunately. This can lead to some folx feeling that their desires aren't "normal" and can be a cause for repression, but I'd like to push the fact that most fetishes are actually NOT a product of sexual repression. As humans, our sexuality is very fluid and we can be attracted to ANYTHING, for any reason! Sometimes it's something you saw as a kid and your brain encoded it as "sexy", or it's something societally accepted as sexy. Other times, it can totally come out of nowhere! Remember that your sexual preferences are just that: your own! Just because you enjoy something doesn't mean someone else will, and vice versa. You'll probably meet many people throughout your life with different sexual preferences, just like we all have different preferences for food. My favorite motto here is "don't yuck someone else's yum". It basically just reminds us to have an understanding that others have different preferences from us and that's totally OK and very normal! If you'd like some encouragement and a reason/place to get out of your safety bubble a little, come to one of my workshops! We safely explore our own desires and learn what we like and what we don't like in a non-judgmental, educational setting. Take some time and find out what your "weird" desires might be! I guarantee you've got a little something that's unique to you :) Good luck! ~Allison

Howdy, y'all! I've gotten some anonymous questions recently, and I wanted to share them with you in case they've been on your mind as well. I'm going to call this series "Ask Allison", and I'm hoping that I get more and more question submissions so I can keep sharing them around. Feel free to contact me any time with yours, and know that these will always be anonymous! Here we go! Dear Allison, I heard that it's important to pee after sex. Is it also important to pee after solo play (masturbation)? If so, do people with penises have to pee after sexual acts too, or just people with vulvas? Sincerely, Peeing and Confused Dear Peeing and Confused, You heard correctly! It's important for every body to pee after sexual acts, including solo play. This is because bacteria from sex acts can make their way into places they shouldn't be, like the urethra. The urethra is the tube that goes from the bladder to the outside world. It has a small opening, on the tip of the penis and slightly underneath the clitoral hood and glans clitoris. Because the "male" urethra extends through the body of the penis and kind of does a little loopdy-loop within the body, it's less common for Assigned Male At Birth (AMAB) folx to get a urinary tract infection (UTI), whereas Assigned Female At Birth (AFAB) folx have a much shorter urethra, only a few inches long, so it's more common to contract bacteria for someone AFAB. But any body can get a UTI, so it's much better to be safe than sorry! And trust me, from experience with UTIs, you will be sorry! Fear not, though - keep reading! If you're concerned that you might have a UTI, it's important to see a physician right away. UTIs are very uncomfortable most of the time, and, left untreated, they can turn into bladder infections which are really really nasty and quite painful for most. Not to scare you here, just a word of caution: untreated bladder infections can cause sepsis (a body-wide infection of the blood) and can be dangerous. And the test is easy - you just pee in a cup! Your doctor will likely prescribe a short course of antibiotics for you - if possible, ask to stay way from one called Cipro (sih-pro), as it has been shown to cause major GI upset and can be difficult, if not impossible to overcome, even with probiotics and the works. Make sure you finish all of the pills and drink lots of water. I'm talking at least 2 liters per day. Remember that having a UTI isn't dirty or shameful. It's actually one of the most common (and luckily treatable and curable) infections out there! Do your part in taking care of your body and you should be just fine. Here are some tips to prevent UTIs, just in case: ALWAYS pee after any sex act Wash your genitals well with warm water (and a mild soap, if you have a penis) ALWAYS wash your sex toys with warm water and a mild soap between uses ALWAYS wash your hands, toys, penises, etc. and anything else you may be inserting from vagina to anus and vice versa If you're using a condom, get a new condom if you're going from anal to vaginal play. And wash ya damn hands! Thanks for your question! I hope this answers it for ya. Stay safe and stay sexy! ~Allison

If you did, yay you! you get 20% off your first session with me! This includes ALL sessions! Just use the code in the email you should've received from me and enter it when prompted. If you're having any issues, don't hesitate to reach out! Don't forget to check back here for updates on upcoming events, workshops, and more sweet, sweet discounts!

Hello again, world and lovely people in it! This is an official announcement that I have a workshop on the books! Here are the quick deets: -When: March 26th, 2024, 6-8pm -Where: Awakening Boutique, 112 E Olive Street, Fort Collins, CO, 80524 -What it's about: The workshop title, BDSM 101, kind of says it all, except for what it doesn't say which is that I'll be educating folx about how they can explore their desires in this beginner-friendly, hands-on, experiential workshop! If you're looking for a safe space where you can learn about how to do those things you've always wanted to do but never had the courage to type into your Google search bar (on Private Browsing Mode, of course), then this is the place for you! Read on for more info... Info, etc.: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/bdsm-101-the-basics-of-bondage-and-kink-tickets-848855980087?aff=ebdsoporgprofile What you'll get at the workshop: -Hands-on (and pants-on) sensory play with you and/or your partner(s) -Demos on how to tie ropes, use handcuffs, paddles, chains, whips, floggers, feathers, and more! -A 101-style education on cultivating pleasure, desire, and communication around BDSM, sensation play, restraints, and impact play What you'll take home: -Tips & tricks for how to cultivate desires, communicate those to your partner(s), and shed the shame you've (potentially) felt about your desires -Knowledge about how to find your magic, rediscover that spark (or an entirely new spark!), and ways to open up not only to others but to yourself as well -FREE STUFF!!! I can't wait to see you there! Remember that all of my workshops are open to all ages (and if you're under 16, please bring a parent or guardian along for the ride), sexualities, genders, gender expressions, ethnicities, nationalities, backgrounds, parents, parents-to-be, single folx, monogamous folx, poly and non-monogamous folx, saved, searching, and anyone else. Just please don't bring your fur babies :) As always, get in touch with me if you have questions about ANYTHING!! See you on the other side!

Come one and come all! This is a space where I'll post tips and tricks, fun factoids, things I'm up to in the sex educator world, and much more! You can even add your comments or questions - just remember to be kind, respectful, and compassionate. Posts that go against these guidelines will be removed. Thanks for your participation, thoughts, and suggestions!